The two main aspects of any conversation are
- How you say something
- What you say
Despite what you might think, the ‘how you say it’ part is far more important than the’ what you say’ part. It is the way that you talk that generates the attraction, so it is imperative to understand the mechanics of the how part. If you struggle with this, then it isn’t going to matter what you talk about.
How you should say it
There are certain key components that make up the ‘how’ of conversation with a woman. The list below is a mixture of verbal and non-verbal communication:
- Body language
- Touching (kino)
- Eye Contact
- Cocky/funny method
- Sending mixed signals
- Controlling the direction of the conversation
If you understand and become skilled at the ‘how’ part, then you will find that the awkward silences, nervousness and any other problems will vanish. In fact, sexual tension will be the result of the silences instead of awkwardness (this is good!). You will also find that the woman will be the one making the effort to keep the conversation flowing.
What you should say
Now on to the part that every guy asks: “what do I talk about?” There are certain topics that women just love, a few examples are shown below. If you discuss topics like these, then it shouldn’t be too difficult to keep the chat flowing:
On the other hand, avoid anything that sounds unpleasant or boring such as rape, kidnapping, murder, chess, computers etc; you get the idea?
When you are in conversation, you don’t just want to talk aimlessly all night. It should be your goal to find out if you have any commonalities with the woman and then to direct the conversation towards this. When you share common interests you will generate rapport and it is human nature to want to be with someone who is similar to us.
Below are a few ideas that can spark some ‘good’ conversation:
- Talk about her friends and family: Are they as cute as she is? Is she the funny one?
- Look around the club for other people/groups that you can make fun of. Maybe look out for a ‘nice’ guy approaching a woman, then point out what he is wearing, his posture, how he is acting etc. Tell her that the woman is feeling no sexual attraction towards him. Make it fun!
- “What’s the craziest thing you have ever done?”
- “How would you spend a million pounds?”
- “How much would it take for you to sleep with a random stranger?”
- Talk about celebrities love lives. Which celebrity would she choose to be with if she could?
- What does she like in a man? (Good for using the cocky/funny stuff).
Open ended questions
One common misconception is that good conversationalists always have amazing stories to tell and have tons of jokes tripping off the end of their tongues. This isn’t the case; remember that a conversation is a two-way process and there has to be interaction from both parties. A good way to establish this is by asking open ended questions.
If you ask questions like “Do you live in London?” they can be answered by a simple yes or no. This obviously kills the conversation. Instead, by simply asking “Where do you live?” it makes it much more open for discussion.
Generally: questions that begin with “do” or “are” can be answered with “yes” or “no” and open ended questions begin with ‘W’ e.g. “what”, “where”, “when”, “who” and “what”. Stick with the W’s!